In the provinces of Canada, Skeeter McCullough's parents, whom were both Irish Immigrants and go unnamed in his book "On Occurrences in the Territories and Near My Cabin" gave birth to Skeeter in 1819 in Trapper's Outpost, a remote trading outpost in the greater Canadian wilds. His mother was a professional fur trapper and his father was an alcoholic prostitute at the local far trading post. Skeeter was never formally educated but claimed to have been educated but claimed in his book to have learned many "skills" from his upbringing at a trading post.
Not much happened for Skeeter in Canada, other than a period or rambling around before a move to Vancouver, but his move to the Arizona Territories in 1850 was said to be the product of numerous fraud charges throughout Canada, according to individuals that knew him in Vancouver that sent letters of testimony during his trial in 1851 at the Arizona Territorial courts.
According to the testimony in the court, he was accused of selling sweetened and particularly thick bog water as Canadian maple syrup, a crime punishable by death in some of the more provincial parts of Canada.
He fled to Cheater's Burg, a small tent town named for its disreputable inhabitants by an adjutant mining camp, in 1850 and was said to have continued his elicit trade in fraudulent syrups. But that would be the least of the damage done by Skeeter in region surrounding Cheater's Burg and the local populace.
During a bout of drunken boasting at the Cheeverham's Beer and Prostitute Emporium located in Cheater's Burg, Skeeter claimed to have invented the greatest sporting event in all of Canada. He made statements to the effect that throughout Canada, and even the Northern parts of Africa, his game was played for large sums of money and posterity.
He would go on to claim that he was forced out of the game by an unnamed associate, whom would go on to riches and fame, while Skeeter had to flee Canada due to his partner framing him for "false syrup production." He was said to be particularly charismatic while drinking and managed to convince the town that a game of "Hatchet Bowl" would place the town on the map and bring fame and fortune to all involved.
According to "On Occurrences in the Territories and Near My Cabin" the rules are simple, a field of 1 sq. mile is cleared and has a line established around the perimeter to delineate the outside boundaries of the play area. Each team, assembled of 20, gathered a one inch thick branches assembled into a triangle made up of four sticks. Each team would construct three of these totems over the playing field. The goal of each team is to disassemble the opposing teams totems by throwing hatchets at them.
The game would begin in the fall of 1851 and end in bloodshed.
A satirical look at obscure historical events in American history that have not been previously reported by the main stream historical press or in their words "In no way ever actually happened."
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
The Orange Cat in The Room: Garfield and Friends Part I
Jim Davis is a famous cartoonist, but few realize that he is a James A. Garfield expert, though he doesn't admit to it or return my phon...
-
Jim Davis is a famous cartoonist, but few realize that he is a James A. Garfield expert, though he doesn't admit to it or return my phon...
No comments:
Post a Comment